The main reason that sheeple of this world give for refusing to accept the existence of extraterrestrials is a complete lack of proof. Such ignorance is trying, to say the least, especially given the evidence that is staring them in the face: Area 51, Russian ‘meteors’ mysteriously shot out of the sky, Hawaiian light shows and so on. Yet still they persist in their denial. What more proof do they need, for fuc…sorry. What more proof do they need?
Now, we are willing to admit that the average alien is extremely skilled in the art of concealment. That’s why you can’t just buy a map to ET’s House in the shops. However, once in a while, one of them goes rogue and threatens to blow the lid on the whole thing. This time, it’s not an ET, it’s a DT.
It feels like Donald Trump has been in and around the spotlight since forever. His colorful business past, extravagant lifestyle, and crazy wife meant he never quite went away. Up until now, most people have dismissed him as a vain buffoon with far too much cash — just another rich asshole enjoying life in the 1%. Since deciding to run for President, however, his behaviour has become increasingly bizarre.
Almost alien, one might say.
Trump is still as arrogant as ever but now appears unable to control himself in public. Apart from the inflammatory rhetoric, he is also displaying unusual ‘powers’. For example, after he was slaughtered in a political debate, he accused the female moderator of “having blood coming out of her eyes, blood coming out of her wherever”. How could he know that? We’ve always been led to believe that’s something only bears and sharks can sense.
Then there are his constant attacks on immigrants. This guy is protesting so much about illegal aliens that he can only be trying to hide in plain sight. How better to avoid suspicion than to deflect it elsewhere? When he claimed that President Obama isn’t “one of us”, why did no one ask him who the ‘us’ referred to?
All evidence points to an alien subversion of the White House, with Trump attempting to install himself as the most powerful man on the planet. Once in power, he would be perfectly placed to prepare for any future invasion. He could dismantle NASA, weaken the general population by slashing medical benefits, and even reduce the military’s ability to fight by getting into another war of attrition. And the true beauty of this plan? If anyone questions his decisions, he can just claim he is doing his job as a Republican.
There’s even the possibility that his ascension to power has already been foretold by Hollywood. In 1997, someone turned up claiming to be the Supreme Being. They, too, began by spouting unintelligible nonsense. There was also exactly the same insistence that only they could save planet Earth.
And they had crazy orange hair as well!