1) Raw breast milk laws. Those bastards are trying to stop you and your babies from sucking on the bare lactating breasts of beautiful mortal females and gorging yourself on the sweet nutritious God given nectar.

2) Government sponsored MIND CONTROL. Yes, these pricks really wants to monitor and control everyone, anyone.

Lucky for you, we’re all over mind control. See below for a free public safety announcement.

This is a unique device that anyone can DIY using electrical conducting material as simple as a piece of foil.

There are six easy steps to follow:

1) Grab a 5 foot sheet of tin foil (preferably heavy duty).

2) Fold 4 times to produce a 1 foot square (shiney side up obviously).

3) Cut a straight line from one corner of the square to the center.

4) Make a cone shape by bending from one side of the cut under the other.

5) Place cone on your head and squash the top and sides so that it fits your head nicely (the tighter the better). Make sure you make a point on the top to increase effectiveness!

6) To ensure that you are protected we recommend securing your Tin Foil Hat ™ by liberally applying holdhouse sticky tape or duct tape.

Now guess what?

Your brainwaves are now safe from “The Man”!

So please help the human race by sharing this with the people you care about (or not…)

The post Simple DIY Device To Protect Yourself From ‘The Man’ appeared first on The Lizard People.

Unless you’ve been living in a cave on Mars you will have heard of the Ice Bucket Challenge. Of course, THEY insist that it is supposed to be a fun way to raise money for good causes. However, to those of us in the know, it is obviously an exercise in mass brainwashing on a scale never before seen.

And from the beginning, certain members of the rich and famous were taking part. Bill Gates’ homemade contraption was one of the reasons the whole thing went viral so quickly, and several other alleged Illuminati have also allowed themselves to be iced. But why? The Challenge is often humiliating and these people already have all the publicity they need, so why are ‘the great and the good’ getting involved?

Many conspiracy theorists have been “just asking questions”, as they do. F**k knows who they’ve been asking, though, as their possibilities range from Satanic rituals to the cleansing of the American population in preparation for mass sacrifice. But what if the real explanation isn’t quite as much fun as all that? What if, as some seem to believe, the Illuminati have cracked one of history’s most sought after secrets?

The secret of Alchemy.

A quick Wiki search will tell you that alchemists spent their lives trying to turn base metals into gold. They were also heavily involved in aqua vitae, the ‘water of life’, which was used for baptisms.

Water. Gold.

Water…into gold?

Could it be possible that the Illuminati managed to combine two alchemical pursuits and have discovered a way to turn water into gold? Think about it. Many of these celebrities are high up in so-called charitable organisations. They take the raw material, some water, chant a few words and then douse themselves. Next, susceptible sheeple across the globe are doing the same thing without really knowing why. Before long, enough water to drench half of Africa has been poured into the ground.

And every time the water falls, green gold is created in a charity’s account.

After that the real magic occurs. Only a fraction of that green gold actually helps people. The rest is ‘disappeared’ into occult practises such as advertising and lobbying, as well as enriching the executives who are begging for money in the first place. And, just like magicians throughout the ages, they’re doing it under our very noses while daring us to spot where they’re hiding the Ace.

The post The True Secret of the Ice Bucket Challenge Revealed appeared first on The Lizard People.