Cocaine is great and the Government know’s it!

Users of the plant have long reported that it’s great for concentration, energy, bodily aches and pains, an overall feeling of well being and as most of you are already aware The Coca Cola (Coke) Company once used it as an ingredient in their famous cola recipe before Big Pharma stepped in along with the Government of the day in 1929 and prohibited the plants medicinal offerings along with other natural medicines such as Heroin.

We interviewed several users, one of them known to us simply as Big Bob who was in fact a scrawny pale fellow who told us “It makes me feel like fucking Super Man bro, like God or some shit, it’s the best fucking thing ever man, normally I am sitting around hating the world contemplating how to end the misery but as soon as I medicate I’m flying on cloud nine, my dick gets rock hard and I feel like I’m a fucken intergalactic super hero man…”

Big Bob may not have a fake degree in medicine like the bacterial scum that prohibited the medicine and then sell it back to us refined, filtered and at quadruple the price with less than a third of the benefits but let’s take a moment to break down what he told us. Cocaine is an antidepressant, an all natural aphrodisiac and a penis enhancement aid.

As we always do, we dug deeper, we went really deep. Right into the depths of the Internet and after several days of wading through forum threads and aimlessly walking the streets of Beverly Hills we ended up at a young mans home. He invited us in after accidentally mistaking our editor Lauren for a street hooker, but as fate would have it he was able to explain the benefits of the medicine from his prolonged use. The mans name was Charlie Sheen.

Here is a list of health benefits attributed directly to Cocaine that we have learnt from our journey.

• Feeling of well being
• Weight loss
• Enhanced energy
• Anti-depressant
• Supports brain function
• Aids concentration and overall mental stamina
• Gives the user a feeling of overwhelming confidence
• Creativity
• Libido function in both men and women
• Aid digestion
• Pain relief

Many famous and successful people over the ages have used Cocaine and yet, you and I are not allowed to touch it for fear that we will overturn world governments and conquer planet Earth.

Lets take a walk down Cocaine lane and look at some of the worlds most successful, brilliant and talented people that used Cocaine to support their fantastic lifestyles.

Sigmund Freud

The father of psychoanalysis was a daily user of Cocaine. Some say he wrote most of his original psychology theory while under the creative and focused influence of Cocaine.

Thomas Edison

Famous world renowned inventor of the light bulb, motion picture and the phonograph once said “I find out what the world needs. Then I go ahead and invent it, straight after a dose of Vin Mariani” The French tonic wine consisted of Cocaine, naturally. It was only later that secret agencies changed the famous quote to “I find out what the world needs. Then I go ahead and invent it.”

Hunter S Thompson

Hunter loved Cocaine so much he would eat it in the morning alongside his bacon, eggs and sausage. Hunter was a great lover of Cocaine. The powers that be knew it and so they killed him for spreading the Cocaine story throughout America and the World.

Stephen King

Some say King battled with Cocaine ‘addiction’ but they are wrong. King was never addicted to Cocaine, King was addicted to life. It just so happens he really enjoyed copious amounts of Coke. King is renowned as one of the worlds most successful writers with many of his books making it to the silver screen.

More…?

Richard Branson, Barack Obama, Jimmy Cayne, Naomi Campbell, 99% of Hollywood, 98% of legal professionals and 34% of politicians.

So the obvious question then becomes. If Cocaine is so good for us, why is it illegal?

Because the man wants you confined to your own natural bodily strengths with all its unholy weaknesses while they the elite chicken neck-technocratic scum snort, swallow and suck up all of the God Given splendors that the Cocaine fields of Columbia can offer humanity.

The post The Cocaine Conspiracy of 1929 appeared first on The Lizard People.

It’s no secret that soft drink manufacturers spend huge sums of money marketing their diet sodas. Just about every advert features attractive and, above all, skinny females fawning over a young guy with a six pack and a face most normal guys want to punch. The not-so-thinly veiled implication is that these allegedly low calorie drinks can help you get thinner.

But what if Diet Cola actually has the opposite effect? What if something in this foul-tasting, way-too-fizzy brown liquid makes you fat instead of thin. And what if it’s now far too late to do anything about it?

We’ve uncovered research that could possibly point to that exact, irrefutable conclusion. In his scientific study, entitled “The Obesity Timebomb – Big Is Not Necessarily Beautiful, So Put Down The Fork”, scientist Percy Percival has stumbled across shocking evidence that he claims will lob a Mentos mint into the Diet Cola industry.

“The most striking aspect of our week-long research,” he wrote on Facebook, “was that every single one of the gravitationally-challenged subjects ordered a Diet Cola with their meal. No matter which fast food establishment they were visiting, no matter whether the food was fried, deep fried or donut, the drink order was always the same.”

Not surprisingly, Percival has been challenged over his findings. Christ, even we challenged him. Yet he remains unmoved by such criticism.

“Of course there are those who would deny such weight change is happening,” he told readers of his WordPress blog. “There are sceptics who believe that the food itself is the problem, and that salad dodgers only order a zero calorie product because it makes them feel less guilty about eating like pigs. Well, I say you only have to look at the data to see that these people are clearly insane. Our study subjects ate eight times per day on average, drinking Diet Cola with every single meal. And look at them, they’re freaking huge! What more proof do you need? Next thing, these naysayers will be telling me it’s Starbucks cake that makes people fat, not the skinny latte.”

However, even if Percival’s research is proven to be correct, what are the chances that the industry will make things right? Will the offending ingredients be removed, thereby sparing millions in need of a foot amputation the shame of being taken to hospital in an armoured truck? No chance. One company tried changing a bestselling formula before, remember, and it nearly bankrupted them. Nope, you can be sure there isn’t going to be a New Diet Cola in the near future.

Or should that be ‘fat’ure?

The post Could Diet Drinks Actually Be Causing Obesity? appeared first on The Lizard People.

It has long been suspected that mankind had a hand in creating the AIDS epidemic. Some say it was engineered by the CIA to wipe out the world’s homosexuals and African Americans, others that it is actually caused by the very drugs that are supposed to treat the disease.

And now, as if one attempt to wipe out half the human race wasn’t enough, it is very possible that the Ebola virus was not started by fruit bats at all. In fact, new information suggests that it was dingbats in a fast food laboratory. According to a technician at the top secret Columbus University of Nutritional Technology, scientists were trying to reverse engineer the delicious Taco Bell burrito when something went horribly wrong.

“We were trying to recreate that exquisite taste and texture under strict laboratory conditions,” said Dwight Lefou, currently of no fixed abode. “We knew that there could be risk involved and I swear we took all possible precautions. We thought we’d nailed it, but instead we seem to have unleashed hell on earth.”

For obvious reasons, the whistleblower has been met with cries of derision from the scientific community, not least because there’s no proof the U.N.T actually exists. He has been dismissed by many as an unstable alcoholic with an axe to grind which, ironically, was exactly the reason quoted by a previous employer for firing him. However, he remains resolute in his belief that his team accidentally created the Doomsday Virus in their quest for the ultimate snack treat.

“Just think about it,” he frequently tells anyone who will listen. “There are just too many similarities for it to be coincidence. Both Ebola and Burrito come from exotic locations and no one is sure which animals are involved. They both cause high temperature, severe stomach cramps and, in many cases, bleeding from the anus.

“There’s no known cure. In both cases it’s a matter of consuming lots of liquids and hoping for the worst to pass quickly. If you’re lucky there isn’t too much long term damage. And finally, it is when the victim is at the height of their suffering that they are most dangerous to those closest to them. Admittedly, the mortality rate for Ebola is 50-90%, so that makes it a little more fatal than Taco Bell, but the signs are all there.”

When asked the obvious question as to how the virus crossed the considerable distance between Africa and his American lab, Lefou simply took a swig from a brown paper bag, mumbling something about an African vacation taken by one of his superiors who had “a thing for monkeys”.

A dangerous drunk? Or a maverick scientist trying to atone for bringing the human race to the brink of extermination? You decide…

The post Ebola Was Fast Food Research Accident appeared first on The Lizard People.

Wikipedia as we all know is a CIA and NSA led global misinformation operation, so instead of giving you misleading information from the Wikipedia article on Ebola, we as always are here to give you the true facts on what Ebola really is and what it’s about to do to Planet Earth and it’s inhabitants.

What is Ebola?

No one really knows what Ebola is.

Not even scientists.

Some say it’s ‘an infectious and generally fatal disease marked by fever and severe internal bleeding, spread through contact with infected body fluids by a filovirus ( Ebola virus ), whose normal host species is unknown.’ but that’s just medical mumbo-jumbo written in such a way to create mass global confusion.

Most truthers have come to know that Ebola is a deadly zombie virus created by evil bio scientists working for the World Health Organization in the 1970’s. It was created as a bioweapon against humanity itself and the host species that some say is “unknown” is in fact zombie blood being harvested from thousands of infected zombies located in a complex underground zombie prison base.

Who you should trust?

Trust no one. Not even us.

Don’t trust “health experts” especially doctors.

Never trust the media, they have proven that in times like these they play second fiddle to their reptilian overlords.

Trust your own instincts.

If you think armageddon is coming by way of a zombie apocalypse disguised as an “Ebola outbreak” and your instincts tell you to start digging a hideout hole for you and your family in your back yard with supreme DIY prowess then obviously, do so. Even if all local intel sources appear to tell the opposite story, and especially if they call you ‘crazy.’

What you should do?

Prepare yourself.

The elite have been preparing for thousands of years.

Recently they have been sending each other coded smoke signals hidden right in front of our eyes by way of programs such as The Walking Dead and many other recent apocalyptic zombie films.

They do this to signal the start of the end to one another. Kind of like a secret handshake and *wink* done over vast distances.

You should take heed from the elite and start storing flashlights, batteries, zombie killing weapons, canned food and of course medicine.

The post EBOLA: The End of World Virus Is Here! appeared first on The Lizard People.

Cancer sucks and so does BIG Pharma.

Here is a list of the TOP 10 methods that won’t cure your cancer that BIG Pharma doesn’t want you to know about.

Instead they continue to let you try these stupid and ridiculous methods, spending your limited time and money while they search for a cure instead.

#1 Prayer

Any prayer of any sort is just a complete waste of time.

It’s f*cking stupid!

Group prayer, prayer in the morning, prayer at night, crying while praying, Christian prayer, Islamic prayer. It just doesn’t work because cancer doesn’t have ears and it’s a bastard.

The same goes for chanting or writing letters to Cancer Santa.

Thanks for the heads up BIG Pharma… not!

#2 Baking Soda

Baking Soda is great for baking your granny’s ultimate heart attack inducing cake but thats all.

Online alternative health pundits have been exclaiming for years that the cure to cancer is in your pantry cupboard right next to the vanilla essence. Unfortunately the medicine companies and cancer research institutes just let you go right along and devour spoonfuls of the stuff without telling you its simply just a great way to bake! Scum!

#3 Snake Oil

They have let you scour the Internet for “snake oil” for decades, without once ever officially telling you that “Snake Oil categorically will not cure your cancer, in fact it doesn’t even exist”.

Not only that, but it’s actually extremely hard to buy, so all you end up doing is searching and searching while they sit in their lab coats staring down the barrell of a microscope.

#4 Not Wearing Deodorant

Not wearing deodorant is disgusting.

But all big pharma will have you do is get embarrassed on public transport by way of not telling you to wear deodorant when they know the truth, they know deodorant doesn’t cause cancer.

#5 Email Forwarding

We have all done it.

And they just sat back and let us do it.

Completely wasting our time… and our bandwidth.

You get a sad and crappy email about some kid whos got cancer, all you have to do is forward it to 7 friends and the kids cancer will be cured right? WRONG!

It never happens, miracles never work on email. Some sicko just decided it would be nice to do that and little of well wishing you just happened to want to believe it, all the while the pharmaceutical companies are sending emails to one another about potential new cures.

#6 Smoking Pot

Lets be honest, there is probably real tangible and medically backed serious research going on right now into the effects of weed on cancer, but smoking it and getting blazed has absolutely nothing to do with that. Sure it might make you hungry so you put some weight on, and it might ease the pain, but smoking just gets you high.

So while you sit there high as a kite, you still have cancer because the real cancer cure likely needs to be extracted by some sort of quantum mechanics and injected into the tumour via constant and persistent special dose, they know this and it makes us sick, just sitting there letting you get high and feel awesome. Pathetic.

#7 Magnets

Magnets are great, for fridges.

Strapping them to your body and expecting them to suck the cancer our is as ridiculous as strapping them to your ass and expecting antigravity to take effect.

Instead of sending you a memo saying “No Jerry, don’t be a dumbass and buy magnets, you should come back for your blood tests instead…” they just continue working their asses off and ignoring you, treating you like the idiot you really are…and they are supposed to be medical professionals, what a joke!

#8 Joining A Cult

Joining scientology might make you look crazy to your friends, but it certainly won’t cure your cancer.

Why they don’t spend any of the money they get from research grants or from the millions in donations they receive annually to run a few radio and TV ads warning you this wont work is beyond belief.

So much money for ads, so little spent.

#9 Magic Water

Magic Water, it comes in many different guises and under many different names.

Silver Colloidal Water, Holy Water, Oxygenated Water, Sugar Water, Salt Water, Magnetic Water, Ionised Water… it’s all just water and water tastes great but it doesn’t kill cancer and they know it.

You sit there guzzling it and pouring it all over your body like the stupid idiot you are and they, the doctors, they just drink plain old tap water… in a non fancy, cheap and reliable glass never even thinking to let you have some of their normal water.

#10 Crystals

New age hippies love them, teenage girls wear them and psychics slatter their tables with them.

They come in all shapes and sizes and are absolutely positively not going to cure any cancer of any sort in any lifetime and thats EXACTLY what BIG Pharma knows… Oh my God, they would help you save soooo much money if they would just not hide this from you.

The post Top 10 Methods for Not Curing Cancer Hidden by BIG Pharma appeared first on The Lizard People.

Thomas Luxembourg of Vancouver Canada says that not only can he communicate with crystals, rocks and stones but that they are trying to tell us something.

We interviewed Thomas, he had this to say:

The Lizard People (TLP): Hi Thomas, welcome. So what can you tell us about your psychic stone communication powers?

Thomas: My pleasure. Well first off it’s not really unique to me, anyone can do it. The problem is that most people don’t open themselves up to intuition enough. Most people have not been taught how to do it because governments and institutions don’t want to acknowledge our true potential.

TLP: Like indigo children?

Thomas: Yes, kind of like that, only indigo children are more special.

TLP: Can you tell us when you first realized you could communicate with stones.

Thomas: Well I have always felt I had a sacred connection to the Earth. When I was around 7 or 8 I was one of the only kids on the block that didn’t like to play with marbles. When my mother asked me why I simply said ‘they don’t like it’ she passed it off as my imagination but it turns out I was really feeling what they felt.

TLP: Wow, that’s amazing. So you could actually feel the marbles emotions?

Thomas: Yeah, I just kind of felt sad and didn’t realize until I was older that I was feeling the marbles anxiety about being used and abused.

TLP: Woah, that’s a super powerful experience. Fast forward to today, what can you tell us about what you’re working on now days?

Thomas: So my regular day to day activities usually involve clients coming in with all sorts of issues from emotional to psychological and even medical, we will usually work on aligning their chakra’s and re-balancing their energy after which we’ll usually prescribe the client a specific crystal to work with over the course of a few weeks to a few months.

Some clients get emotionally attached to their crystals, it’s actually a real problem for us because we can’t just give them away.

TLP: You mean there are different crystals for different ailments?

Thomas: That’s right. Some crystals have the power to ground the energy and initiate a kind of harmonic balancing of someones emotions while others can energize and even increase libido.

TLP: Haha, viagra crystal therapy.

Thomas: Yeah, we get that a lot haha.

TLP: So what advice can you give our readers?

Thomas: I suppose the overall thing we can learn from rocks, stones and crystals is to just chill out and relax. They themselves are great at it and I think it’s something we can learn from their species. People are so involved in the trials and tribulations of life, we are constantly bombarded by information, we just need to relax.

Many human problems and medical conditions arise because of stress. Stress is something we should all avoid.

TLP: So what do you do when you’re driving to work in peak hour traffic and you’re getting anxiety?

Thomas: It’s all about planning. If you know the drive to work stresses you out then consult with your crystal, sit down drink some chai, relax and what you’ll probably find is that a solution will arise and the next day you’ll just feel it would be better to ride a bike or find a job closer to home.

TLP: It almost seems too good to be true. What about in a general sense. How do we bring about that overall sense of stress free balance and harmony?

Thomas: Just be still, be like a rock. Assimilate the rock.

TLP: Like meditation?

Thomas: Kind of like that, yes.

TLP: Well its been truly enlightening to have you stop by Thomas, thank you.

Thomas: Thanks for having me

The post Crystals, Rocks and Stones Are Trying To Tell Us Something? appeared first on The Lizard People.

Many people are abundantly aware of how deadly peanuts can be with several people being killed by peanut induced anaphylaxis each year.

The mainstream media has beaten the drum of fear loudly and repeatedly induced horror movie like paralysis in people all over the peanut loving world in recent times.

It is estimated that in the U.S. alone, only 150 people die from all food related allergies combined, including maybe a few from peanuts.

As we all know, money makes the world go round and when you follow the money there is usually a secret government agenda, and at the heart of it is likely an evil plot to kill you and your family.

In the case of peanut allergies. The peanut money points directly to world governments. U.S., U.K., Europe, Canada, China. And that intel comes from prominent sources online that we have ties to such as the US Marines.

Peanuts themselves are supposed to be a delicious snack that all types of people from all walks of life love to eat. Who doesn’t love a good peanut? Be it with an ice cold beer or gently resting in between a wall of chocolate?

But of course the government has to step in and ruin every good party. Unlike most normal foods such as cheeseburgers or fried chicken peanuts are grown naturally which means they should be OK to eat. But they aren’t!

For some unknown reason peanuts cause a very specific amount of people to go into cardiac arrest or anaphylaxis and then die. The range of psychotic and horrible possibilities of what the government can do with such a bio weapon is endless.

And as usual where there are other uses or possibilities they will use them. For example, one of those other possibilities is Psychological Warfare and its no longer a possibility but now a fact.

The government is using peanuts in Psychological Warfare as explained by Dr. Nicholas Christakis saying that measures taken to ensure allergic children are not exposed is disproportinal to actual risk and that popular responses “bear many of the hallmarks of mass psychogenic illness”.

Just when you think they have run out of possibilities to screw with you and your family… they come out with a “solution”. That solution folks, is called the EpiPen. A “pen” filled with adrenaline that comes with a vast range of dangers that they even admit, cold bloodedly.

Just take a look at the admissions in this FDA Warning Letter…

“Adverse reactions observed with EpiPen are anxiety, apprehensiveness, restlessness,

tremor, weakness, dizziness, sweating, palpitations, pallor, nausea and vomiting, headache,

respiratory difficulties, arrhythmias, hypertension, and angina. “

The real answer to 1984, is not to eat peanuts folks.

The post KILLER PEANUTS: The Secret Government Agenda appeared first on The Lizard People.

Popular singer-songwriter Jason Mraz has taken to Reddit’s Ask Me Anything (AMA) where users are allowed to ask important or interesting people such as celebrities a variety of different questions and receive a written response.

Jason Mraz was asked by Reddit user verytiti

“What is your favourite guilty pleasure activity? And I basically listen to your music before bed every single night! Thanks for doing the AMA.”

Jason responded by saying:

“Up until a few weeks ago, movie popcorn was my biggest guilty pleasure. I would binge eat. But then I found out movie popcorn is made from GMO corn. More than 80% of the corn grown in the US is Genetically Modified Corn. It is modified to have a pesticide IN the corn, so when bugs try to eat it, their stomach explodes. Well, the same happens inside human stomachs. Tiny ruptures cause guts to leak. And leaky guts create gastro-intestinal problems and inflammation. All illnesses come from inflammation. These GMO foods and intestinal tears are also directly linked to food allergy. We develop allergies to foods because our guts have leaked bile into the body and body says, okay, no more of that. Have you noticed a rise in food allergies in your community? Of course you have. We all need to vote NO on GMOS and demand proper GMO labeling. Otherwise we will keep eating poison. GMO’s can also be linked to the rise in autism cases. If an infant drinks GMO soy baby formula, odds are that child will have MANY food allergies and possibly develop autism. YIKES! Say no to GMOs!!!!!”

You can see the full Q&A here

Jason is a true info warrior because as all of us educated people know GMO’s are bad and of course Jason Mraz is right when he says that all known human illnesses come from inflammation. Well done Jason, you are a true hero!

Although we at TheLizardPeople.com realize just how powerful Jasons information power nuke is on the minds of sleeping unaware sheeple everywhere, for some unknown reason many of Reddits users don’t feel the same way. Here’s what some of them have to say:

zappa: “wow, what a fucking moron.”

ghostofpennwast: “Idiot. And autism? Seriously? Go join Jenny Mccarthy.”

bigrustledjimmies: “You are a dumbass”

badasspiggy: “That’s one of the most retarded things I’ve ever read. No offense, but stick to just music from now on.”

These user posts are more than likely highly paid for secret government web troll hackers being controlled by black op’s government agents. There is no way this many random online users think Jason Mraz is ‘retard’.

Please share this everyone, get the information out there and help support Jason Mraz for telling the truth!

The post Jason Mraz Knows What Causes Autism appeared first on The Lizard People.